#5 | Race of 2015

No. 5 | No. 4 | No. 3 | No. 2 | No. 1

Disgraceful. Insane. Hilarious. Awful. Jog-fest.

These, among many others, are words that have been used to describe our #5 race of 2015. Stoopid was another such descriptive word implemented although I didn’t list it for obvious reasons. But regardless, this race got the people talking, apparently even the less-educated types.

This was a race that you either loved or hated, but most certainly watched, because more than any other this year, this race forced you to take a side. There were no neutral parties. After watching the 2015 Penn Relays men’s 4xMile, you went one of two ways: pro-jog or anti-jog. Those were the sides and you had to pick.

It was a choice either for or against the madness that unfolded in this race’s fourth leg.

There was just no in-between. And that’s what made this race so bananas, aside from the wild finish, of course (I’ll get to that). I mean, they nearly stopped running. It was utter pandemonium. Tactical racing entered uncharted territory on April 25th, 2015 at Franklin Field in the final leg of this instant classic, and that was when you had to take a moment and decide if 1) it made you happy or 2) it made you angry. This race was the likable all-out effort’s foil, so not taking a side on this one was the equivalent of not having an opinion on Donald Trump.

This was a race that finally made you determine if there was a point where tactics can become excessive, so much so that it can ruin a race. Is there a line that athletes shouldn’t cross while sizing up their competition for a frantic finish? How slow is too slow? Or is there such a thing? These were questions for you to answer.

It became almost political, as some thought the integrity of the sport was violated. This was a dumb thought but some thought it. The quasi keeper of track and field integrity according to some, Steve Prefontaine, was said to have turned over in his grave by one dude. Their (the athletes that is) extreme defiance of our traditional understanding of racing was so hype that it had the power to awaken the dead. Damn, maybe this race should’ve been #1 now that I think of it.

If you’ve read this far and have no idea what I’m talking about because you’ve never seen this particular 4xMile, I strongly suggest you stop reading and just watch the race. Sure, it’s 16:18 long, but the length is also what makes it so great. Because by the time Villanova’s Jordy Williamsz crosses the line, you’re just an emotional wreck. I was announcing the race and by the end of it the only thing I could think to do was to scream some god awful noise that a human should never make. It was just that epic.

Anyways, here’s a not-so-brief recap of some of my favorite moments with their respective time stamps:

0:42: After a slow opening 200m by the lead-off legs, I point out that any chance of a mythical sub-16:00 is probably shot already. “That probably already spells the end,” I say. This isn’t a critical or important moment, and it’s not even really that accurate since Oregon’s Daniel Winn and ‘Nova’s Sam McEntee would end up running a respectable 4:02-ish in this leg. I just thought I’d mention it because it makes me sound smart.

Reminder: A lot of the allure of this race has been the pursuit of that 16:00 barrier, because it’s never been done at the Penn Relays (or by any college team for that matter). That of course averages out to four sub-4 miles, no easy task on its own, but especially difficult considering this race always seems to become tactical. Even when schools have had the arsenal to post something in the 15s, the pull of tactics has kept this at bay. The 2005 Michigan Wolverines have the meet record of 16:04.54 and that team had Nick Willis and Nate Brannen on the last two legs. With four athletes essentially running four different races, it’s just not reasonable to expect the whole thing to be fast.

BUT ANYWAYS…

8:03: Halfway. I’m mostly ignoring the first half because the end takes up a lot of space.

But just know that the second leggers did their thing and kept the pace respectable.

9:05: Damn you third legs. A 62-second opener by ’Nova's Pat Tiernan (with Oregon, Stanford, Cornell, G-Town, and Penn close by) seems to set the tone for a pedestrian penultimate mile. These aforementioned schools are the only teams in view.

9:18: With the pace continuing to lag, I note that “sub-16:00 may not be an important thing for them [the athletes], that might just be something we hyped.” I’ve probably never said anything more true.

9:48: Oregon’s Will Geoghegan takes over the lead from Tiernan and starts ramping up the pace. Good man. Also, at this point I’ve pretty much forgotten that anyone besides Oregon, ’Nova, Stanford, Cornell, Georgetown, or Penn is even in the race.

10:41: Geoghegan and Tiernan break away, seemingly for good. In retrospect, we know that’s not the case.

11:26: Geoghegan starts hammering. King Cheserek is waiting.

11:57: Tiernan catches back up to Geoghegan and dear lord we’re gonna get the race we wanted! The defending champs (Oregon) v. the international machine/somewhat hometown team (‘Nova).

12:02: Sticks swap hands for the final time, with Cheserek taking it for Oregon and Williamsz for Villanova. Yeah baby!

12:03: LITERALLY ONE SECOND LATER. The brakes are applied. Bye-bye sub-16:00. I coin the term “jog-fest.” This is where it starts to get good/bad depending on your world view that I discussed at length above.

But no matter, because Edward Cheserek is on the track— get your popcorn.

12:08: The next closest team, Stanford, gets the stick some five seconds behind Oregon and ‘Nova.

12:35: Sean McGorty (Stanford) and Ahmed Bile (G-Town) catch up to Cheserek and Williamsz. The crowd starts to boo because of the slow pace, but they ain’t seen nothing yet.

12:45: Cornell catches back up to the lead group. King Ches leads and it’s now only moderately slow but still slow.

13:18: WHAT IS HAPPENING……….? Did someone drop their contact lens or something? Cheserek looks around and slows to a halt. INITIATE JOG-FEST MODE 2.0!!!! Cheserek doesn’t want to lead and no one else apparently does either. “They are stopping on the track!” says Gordon.


Um... guys?

The boos are LOUD. This is the peak moment of the good vs. bad debate.

13:35: Bile darts to the front like he’s gonna end this jogging madness, but no! He’s just taunting the crowd like he’s Maximus from Gladiator or something. Four seconds later he slams on the brakes.





I’m dying at this point and not just because I’ve been at Franklin Field for something like 90 straight hours.

13:42: Cheserek sprints back to the front and TOTALLY REDEEMS HIMSELF.

I’m still very much in shock from what just transpired in the last 30 seconds as shown by my hyena-like laughter.

14:25: The King’s move chops the pack down to just four teams (Oregon, ‘Nova, Stanford, and G-Town, with Cornell just trying to hang on). But guess what. He’s doing it again. Cheserek slows at nearly the exact same spot that he did a lap prior.

14:35: Cornell’s Connor Herr has had enough. He’s caught up with the latest pit stop and screw it, he says, I’m taking on Ches/Williamsz/McGorty/Bile. A 4:16 miler now has the lead over four sub-4 milers.

Boos are LOUDER.

14:40: Aaaannnnddddd now nine teams are in this race with 700 meters to run. Penn is back, and the teams from Wisconsin, Oklahoma, and Indiana are now suddenly in play. These teams were like so three legs ago just a minute earlier.

They have not been jogging, however, and this will show itself soon enough.

15:10: Our brave soul from Cornell is now in ninth because the real racing is starting. Oklahoma’s Brandon Doughty leads with Ches lurking.

15:25: One. To. Go.

15:40: Wisconsin’s Joe Hardy makes the first move. He should not have made the first move but thank God he did.

Hardy sets up our soon-to-be all-timer of a finish.

15:51: Cheserek takes over the lead and 99.9% of the world believes the race is over.

200m to go.

16:00: Jordy Williamsz has packed his jet-pack and even remembered the NOS.

Dude is feeling it. But he can’t mow down Ches, can he?

16:12: HE CAN!

16:15: GIVE IT ONE LAST LOOK, JORDY.



Here’s where I scream because words just won’t do anymore.

16:18: Villanova just won the 2015 Penn Relays 4xMile in 16:18.07 and no one on Earth cares that it wasn’t under 16 minutes.

Jordy Williamsz ran a 4:13 mile with a 52-second last lap. THIS RACE, AMIRITE?

And to think, some people called it a disgrace. How stoopid.